Chicago, ILLINOIS — Buxom blonde Cherry Putnam is feeling good after having helped a blind old man cross the street yesterday at the height of Black Friday shopping madness.
Michael Jackson, the erstwhile King of Pop now demoted to overseas jesting, has filed a collective lawsuit against various print and Internet publishers for refusing to publish photographs showing him and son “Prince” in Hallmark “father-and-son” moments.
Billy Corgan, the esteemed leader of The Smashing Pumpkins, will be taking vocal lessons to make his voice sound less whiny and child-like.